I don't feel bad

Back by popular demand...

Ignorant Hoodlum: How much are these?

Me: $1.98

IH: (Hand over a dollar) There's one.

(pause)

IH: I say we call it good.

Me: I say you try again.

IH: Fine...(Hands over some change)

IH: What's that?

Me: 75 cents.

IH: Well how much more I need?

Me: What's 98 - 75?

(Pause)

IH: (With defiant attitude) That good?

Me: That's 15 cents. What's 75 + 15?

IH: (With Disgust) Here's a dime, keep the change. G** D***! Why you gotta be such a %$^&? Let's get outta hur!

Me: (Casually yells to them on their way out) Be cool, stay in school!

Don't worry, I am not usually this abrupt to people who can't count. But this kid had already offended every other person in the store with his language and gestures and rather than asking him to leave, I thought it might be more affective to make him feel like an idiot.

Some days, I do love my job.

Busy getting stuff done

In response to Tuesday's elections, President Obama related that "People are angry and they're frustrated. Not just because of what's happened in the last year or two years, but what's happened over the last eight years."

There you have it, out of the mouth of our elected leader we....wait, what?

The people of Massachusetts have been stewing in fury for eight years that they waited until their beloved democratic senator died so they could stick it to the man, by voting Republican? I don't understand. Perhaps the President will explain it to me.

"We were so busy just getting stuff done and dealing with the immediate crises that were in front of us, that I think we lost some of that sense of, of, you know, speaking directly to the American people about what their core values are...I think that, you know, what they've ended up seeing is this feeling of remoteness and detachment."

So busy getting stuff done? Like what? The 158 media interviews during the last year? The 411 speeches to speak to us to remind us what our core values are? Don't insult me. Perhaps the feelings of remoteness and detachment comes from the fact that Americans are still out of work, out of money and tired of watching you walk the dog on 20/20. Being the President is hard work, work that I do not envy. There are very advanced problems in this country that will take some time to solve. I would rather you just say, 'We're not their yet' instead of blaming it on my anger and being out of touch with all the work you have already done.

Not pulling the punches

Conan, in a very funny-yet hard blow to NBC, listed is show on Craig's List. This is another great joke that will surely rally the support from his fans. But I can't imagine NBC will appreciate this.

But it is pretty clear he doesn't care.

Reversing Time

Well I guess there is hope for us yet. Scientists have turned back the doomsday clock back a minute.

What shall I do with the new-found extra time I have.

Rock your body remix

A woman walked past me in the mall who was, very obviously, mentally handicapped. She was walking with a walker and with someone else holding onto her to keep her from falling. Even with that assistance, she walked like balance was a very serious challenge. However, Justin Timberlake's "Rock your body" was playing overhead and her limp-walk was in perfect sync to the beat of the song. She looked like she was strutting to the music. As I passed her with a smile on my face I thought, "If you are doing that on purpose, God bless you."

The begining of the end...

And so it begins...

The thing about same sex marriage is that its not the actual marriage that will tear this country apart. The hatred that spawns from this issue is what is going to completely polarize this already fragmented country. Adding fuel to this fire will only give both sides a reason to hate each other more. I do not see any way to land on either side of this argument without accruing enemies from the other end of the spectrum.

So here we go; The biggest trial of the century is about to big. It ironic, though, this case is primarily based on love and it will spawn only more hatred in the world for one another.

And so it begins.

Is Shawbooya a word?

Yours truly just landed a $15 Million contract last night. No details yet due to the fact that I would rather not jinx anything. But I am starting to bid farewell to my 9-5, making ends barely meet, watching mall-walking, listening to the same four hour music track-ing, come home and collapse for three hours and get up and do-it-again...life.

New checklist

1) Debt. Gone.
2) Cable? Yes. I shall not miss another sporting event unless someone is dying...or being born
3) Wife? New shoes.
4) Disneyland.